Welcome back to toasted n’ posted where only the dankest is roasted. Despite a brief hiatus, I am happy to report that we will be getting back to expanding our massive strain library and educational resource. While frequency is still up to the stars, I will make an honest effort to continue to inform about the hottest strains in the game. This strain is from Archive Seeds and was intentionally left a riddle. Without further adieu, let’s roll up and unravel this mystery.
A raw barky burp of cherry-wood spills out onto a shelled bank of effervescent fruit. Ropes of tangy bounce are stretched taut over bogs of bubbling berry and seductive syrupy muck. Intermittent spits of smooth molasses quickly cement into tart lime spikes. A bouquet equal part hugs and uppercuts; this sensation brutalizes your senses out of the jar while still holding you prisoner with its resonant charm. At the interlude moment when the tide of consuming tropical fizz recedes, you are able to appreciate some of the earthier qualities and how they companion the natural sour within. A bath bombed with under-ripe grapes and scalding fruit punch.
The profile bares similar whimsy to the refreshing fumes of a cream soda, without the punishing vanilla overload. Crisp, refreshing, then helplessly enchanting. This is the type of strain you’d rather smell all day than smoke and risk losing it. Electric, sharp, and satisfying; the amorphous salad of cherry-lime and grape will pummel your senses until they are numb. Such an introduction calls me to question what may be lurking underneath.
I snap into the center and plunge my nose boldly forth; expecting a vicious burst of relative nuance, my world is completely subverted. Parting the seas of luscious fruit, I am greeted by a stranger. Eucalyptus swaddles me in a regenerative chill. A soothing tickle of forest fresh giving way to a peppery snap, awakening you from the momentary stupor. A palate cleanser that lingers just long enough to put a pseudo-minty spin on the familiar fruit-bound flood. Other than a unique crispness enhancing the dominant sweet attributes, this strain presents itself openly.
Leaf to flame, I am blanketed in the steamy sap of a Wonka forest. Brittle candy derived from jungles of citrus and berry. Each cloud somehow still textured as physical sugar cubes dissolving in my mouth. My face stretches as my nose expands into a life form worthy of so many scents and sensations. Countless invisible forceps knead at my face. A tight crunch of herb regulates the bulldozing dominance of the fruity tithes. The rivalry ultimately dwarfed by the oncoming tsunami of soapy key lime foam.
As with the barreling berry missiles, a challenger rises to contend and balance. The razor edge of the stunning citrus is grounded by an abrupt floor of charred chestnut. The tantalizing assault again is quelled and retires to a muddy and tropical chutney. Puckering citrus and a hashy backboard, never an unworthy combination. The one sincere accolade I can offer immediately is how this profile hadn’t lost a shred of the terpenes throughout the burn. At that, it was effortlessly smooth. Despite my claims of shocking limes and brutalizing berries, this strain manages to still be kind.
My head is physically driven back with each electric rip, so much so, that the initial effects are muted. As the smoke clears, both figuratively and literally, you feel your head encased in a Jell-O mold. In a smokescreen transition, your perfectly functioning skull has been replaced with gelatin. A self-contained ocean of jiggly calm. I couldn’t have imagined the spiritual nirvana that accompanied becoming gelatin. Flexible yet firm. I take pride in my empty mind and newfound rubbery resilience. Assuaging any minor aches, particularly pertaining to intestinal and joint, the ascension continues to strip you of your weary human form. Jell-O doesn’t think, it doesn’t feel, it simply exists; as will you.
Having been helplessly launched into meditative introspection, I feel as if I could watch each drop of rain fall from a stormy sky. Within this, exists a real irony. While a zen master may see everything, you will be too far from your body to capitalize on any such opportunity. Take peace in your newfound sanctuary within yourself as you continue to bathe in the scathing lime fumes. While this strain is more focused with its effects, it hits each one with stride.
All in all, this strain was a pleasure to sit down with. A real winner, with its only flaw being what could be viewed as a slight under-delivery in terms of sensation. Though, that doesn’t make it necessarily bad, some could consider it more ideal. For those seeking to achieve very targeted relief, I could see this strain working its way into the regiments of many. Until next time…
Stay high and stay blessed,
S1 Score: 90/100